Friday, January 4, 2019

It's only January 4th and I'm already a month behind

You ever have SO MUCH TO DO that all you can manage is to sit through another episode of Brooklyn 99? ("NINE NINE!!")

My to-do list literally has "write to-do list" on it. This... can't be good.

So anyhoo, while my house sits in shambles from uninstalling Christmas, and the end of year paperwork piles up, and last month's leftovers develop sentience in the fridge... let's talk about what my friend Serena of Living By Disney put up today:


Go read her post on IG for more thoughts on this; she hits it right on the head. (And while you're there, follow her for amazing Disney coverage. She's one of us. 'Nuff said.)

I've talked about managing our social media feeds before, but I needed this reminder today. Especially now, when I'm drowning in New Year's Resolutions and feeling overwhelmed about where to start. One thing we can ALL do, right now, is take control of what we're feeding our brains on social media, and be a little more intentional about how we choose to make ourselves FEEL.

Case in point, I'm noticing Bored Panda is really ramping up the "Outrage Porn" lately. You know, all that stuff designed to make us mad and race to the comment section to express our outrage - like this one at the top of my feed RIGHT NOW:


Must. Not. Engage...
(Pun intended. Always.)

Obviously these posts are showing up more often because more people on clicking on them and commenting. We're rewarding bad behavior - yep, I'm guilty, too - and ultimately hurting ourselves by filling our feeds with negativity and cruelty.

So as much as I like some of Bored Panda's other content, and even though I do my best to scroll past these growdy ones, I'm unfollowing the page today. It took that nudge from Serena to remind me that I need to be more mindful of what I'm looking at, and more importantly, how it makes me feel. If a page routinely makes me hate humanity, then hey, MAYBE I SHOULDN'T LOOK AT THAT PAGE.  Ground-breaking stuff, I know, but at least that's one Resolution I think I can manage this week.

How about you? Are you with me? Will you look a little harder as you scroll this week? Will you take note of the stuff that makes you feel happy and inspired, and also the stuff that makes you feel angry or lesser? And as a flip side for unfollowing the bad, how about leaving a nice comment or sharing your favorite posts from the good? (Quick shout-out to all of you who share on FOE for keeping my feed full of happy nerdery - and to the mods for keeping it a safe space. Love you guys!)

And finally, since we all post our OWN content, too, even if it's just for friends and family, here's one last challenge: Be the feed you want to see in the world. 


*****

Now, let's see what the winner of my sunny Pygmy Puff is going to name her! (Drum roll, please.)


 ::Virtual Random Number Generator Spinning::

Aaaand the winner is Jamie, who will be naming Puff "Lemon Drop!" Aw, so perfect. Congrats, Jamie, and please e-mail me your mailing address so we can ship Lemon Drop your way!


25 comments:

  1. OOOH interesting you say that about BoredPanda as I have just decided to block myself from seeing it. They have WAY too much "this animal was tortured by scumbags" stuff and I just don;t want to see that. this is the only truly safe space on the internet that I know of!

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  2. I've been cleansing my Twitter feed as of late. Facebook isn't as easy but at least you can snooze folks for 30 days.

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    1. I snooze folks for 30 days and when they show up again if they still are "bothering" me, they get the hide forever. Some I'll revisit after a while... "I wonder what xx is up to?" but most end up getting culled from the friends list. sigh...so much better.

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  3. Last time I talked to my therapist she mentioned something similar - that we should be seeing 5 good things for every 1 bad thing to keep us feeling positively. With all the bad stuff out there to see, it's harder than it seems.

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  4. Hear, hear! Those of us who are sensitive must be vigilant about what type of content we allow. I try really hard to stick with happy, positive, fun stuff (like your blogs). I also had to unfollow a couple of blogs that I really enjoy because their monetezation practices were so irritating. When there is a sponsored post (instead of actual content)every week, they have to go. When the content itself will not load because the obnoxious, flashing ads have to load first, they have to go. Instead of feeling irritated every time I try to read a post, I let go!

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  5. I'm doing an email clearing. I am good about not falling into the "sale! sale! SALE!!!!" offers that I get EVERY DAY (looking at you Loft), but still - why even introduce temptation?

    I have been reading more Buzzfeed lately, which would seem to be along the same lines as BoredPanda, but Buzzfeed is inspiring me. They have a LOT of lists for cleaning/organizing inspiration, and I am definitely taking notes.

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    1. I love "unroll.me" for allowing me to put all of the "sale, SALE" emails into one "roll up", which I can read if I choose (birthday shopping) or delete at will (all the rest of the time). Not perfect--but so much better!

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  6. Always a good reminder! And I can't believe that Bored Panda article--yuck! (Also, totally love the "outrage porn" term! I don't know if you coined it, but it is spot on!)

    Some of my favorite places online are Text from Superheroes

    a Canadian slice of life comic

    And Atomic Robo

    So I guess today they are all comics (of course your blogs are at the very top! Thank you for that!).

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    1. I can't tell if those links are working... Google might be necessary. The Canadian one is called Boumeries :)

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  7. I've been unsubscribing from so many email lists today, not because of negativity but just the sheer number of them and mostly "you know you want to buy this" which is great if you have money but if you don't... It was just causing me stress so I had to unsub. As far as social media goes, FOE is a great group! Positive, creative, friendly... seriously, thanks for the safe fun space, you guys! And to you, Jen and John, for this safe friendly space and being the inspiration for FOE. Happy 2019!

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  8. After seeing that, I started being more vigilant about removing the black clouds in my feed instead of just rolling my eyes and moving on.... I don't need that.

    Also - NINE NINE!!

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  9. The thing about anger is that it makes you feel more powerful, which is why that kind of crap can become so addicting. It takes a good dose of self-awareness to step back and think, 'Hey, maybe this isn't good for me.'

    If any of you are into knitting, crochet or weaving, I've found Ravelry.com to be a 'good people' zone. Lots of good geeky groups to join and politics verboten in most of them.

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    1. I've never heard it put that way, but I think you're right on the money with anger = feeling powerful. To quote my favorite pointy-eared hobgoblin: "Fascinating."

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  10. I am grateful to belong to Fans of Epbot, because everyone there acts as an editor of the internet for me. People only post things that are happy or funny or useful or heartwarming or interesting, and warn you if you shouldn't read the comments. Saves me lots of time and negativity.

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  11. I'm glad I'm not the only one disappointed in Bored Panda lately! I thought I might be going crazy. It used to be such a happy site. I'm going to stop telling myself I'm crazy and join you in unfollowing them.

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  12. Congrats to Jamie and Lemon Drop! 🤩

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  13. I have a rule for Facebook (not so much for Instagram and Twitter). Basically it goes like this; if I wouldn't let you in my house, you aren't allowed on my friends list. Period. And if someone on my friends list does something that makes me unhappy to be friends with them, then off they go (either unfollowed or unfriended depending on my irritation levels). It's made my whole feed better. (Instagram I have the rule of, if I start to feel unhappy seeing your posts, then I unfollow you. Twitter is weird and so I tend to avoid it unless I'm venting my outrage to the universe.) Hooray for curating our social media lives! It makes me feel so powerful to do it.

    Also congratulations to Jamie! I hope Lemon Drop brings much joy.

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  14. I've been reading this blog for years now, and the reason you have no idea who I am is that I quit all forms of social media ages ago, thus the constant anonymity. And I've been much happier since. I have a short list of individual blogs and sites that I check by manually typing in their urls every day (including yours, obviously), and that's it. It cures not only the negativity, but also the addiction. I'm actually getting things done now instead of just refreshing my various feeds at set intervals.

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  15. And that's why this is literally the only blog I follow. You empower without being saccharin, you instruct without patronizing, and you inspire your readers to try new things.

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  16. I started my purge of social media right before Christmas. Besides keeping so much negativity out of my feed, it's saving me SO much time. You don't know how much time you waste scrolling through other people's lives until you're NOT doing it anymore.

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  17. I'm afraid I don't even know what Bored Panda is. I never learned to really "surf" the web, I just don't know what to look for. I got on facebook a year ago, when my family discovered we had a brother we never knew about, I go to your 2 sites, and The Pioneer Woman, and that's about it. Oh, I have email too, which consists of going to it each day and deleting everything.

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  18. I ALWAYS start my to-do lists with "Make to-do list". That way, if nothing else, I can scratch that item off (once I've added enough stuff to the list to actually feel like it's a list. Which, if I'm actually making a list, doesn't take long because I have a half a blue-zillion things to do) and feel like I've accomplished something. It's a little thing. It's kinda silly. But IT MAKES ME FEEL GOOD! I also add things that I actually want to do. Things like, "read comics", "have snack", "work on Lego Hogwarts", "watch episode of Psych". I try not to do all of those things at once, but adding them to my list makes the list just a list of things that I do rather than a list of "dumb adult stuff that I have to get done even though I want to curl up on the couch with my book and a cat and a cup of tea". When I do those things, I get to cross them off the list and, again, it's kinda silly but it MAKES ME FEEL GOOD. Same goes for writing things on the list after I've done them and then immediately crossing them off. Sometimes it's the momentum of seeing what I've done that keeps me going and helps me get the less fun stuff done.

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  19. Thanks for this post, Jen, this is exactly why I got off all social media a couple of years ago! Amazingly, this has given me more time to actually socialize with people AND do things on my to do lists :-). Plus try some of the amazing crafts I see here and a couple of other places.

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  20. www.cutetropolis.com www.thebloggess.com www.martymousehouse.com and myshetland.co.uk for NON- nasty posts.

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  21. I've always been pretty big on to do lists. They keep me organized and give me a sense of accomplishment and help me to quantify my successes. However, it was an extremely difficult year and I was feeling pretty worthless. My husband pointed out that I make these lists that focus on how much I feel like I need to do and suggested that I instead make a list of everything I have done or accomplished throughout the day so I can look back and see how much I did. It really helped. It not only gave me something I could look at and say, "Wow I really did a lot today", it helped me notice what I was accomplishing throughout the day and feel better about myself.

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