Kingdom Hearts 3: The Good, The Bad, & The One Reason I Keep Yelling At The Screen

Here's a first for me: I started playing a video game the very day it was released! Me! The girl who stumbles on to every Popular Thing at least 2 years too late!

I didn't plan to play Kingdom Hearts 3 this soon, but John brought it home Wednesday night as a surprise. "Here," he said, "you can play this while I'm re-plumbing the house." Which was the most romantic thing anyone has ever said in the history of the entire world.

I'm about 9 hours into the game, and as one might expect, I have thoughts. Good thoughts. Bad thoughts. Conflicted thoughts. Thoughts that make me think in short, choppy sentences.

That's right, this is a job for... BULLET POINTS.

The Good:

- The Fighting 

The fighting in Kingdom Hearts has always been fun, but in KH3 it is INSANELY fun. Button-mashing galore, eye-candy combos left and right, and new special moves that call down Disney rides (like Splash Mountain or the Tea Cups) to bash your enemies with. SO SO FUN. 

It's all pretty easy, too, since you use the same 3 buttons to do all your combo moves. So just keep mashin' away, follow the prompts on screen, and cool things are gonna happen.

- The Exploring

The graphics and areas maps are gorgeous, of course, and just like the previous games you can smash most things around you to get health and rewards. There are also hidden chests, food ingredients, and a scavenger hunt for Hidden Mickeys that make exploring just as much fun as the fighting.

 

 - The Themed Lands

Let's be honest, this is the main draw for all of us, right? Getting to play inside your favorite Disney movies? And seeing all of Sora's themed outfits and Keyblades?

In Toy Story land, they're actual toys! Eeee!

Honestly, these 3 things are all I want out of Kingdom Hearts: I want to explore the Disney-themed worlds, watch a fun cut scene or two, and smash bad guys with giant teacups shooting fireworks. You know, the little things.

Ahhh, but enter...

The Bad:

- The Gummi Ship travel

Ug, tedious and not fun. The graphics are a little better than the last KH, but let's be real: no one is playing Kingdom Hearts to customize a LEGO rocket ship and navigate - slowly - around asteroids. Basically an unskippable intermission on the way to the good stuff.

That's a minor quibble compared to the one TRULY bad thing, though:

TWIP: Let's Talk About My Plumbing

Real Talk: No one should be treated differently because of their plumbing.

I mean, ten years ago CPVC was the standard! THE STANDARD, I SAY.

Which brings me to this week's highlight:

 

Ripping open our walls and annoying the cats.

This is actually the second time John's re-plumbed our house. The last time was over a decade ago, and since then a new and better type of piping called Pex has become the industry standard. Our old PVC had a few slow leaks here and there that kept John awake at night, so we've been planning this for nearly a year - we've just been waiting for our Florida "winter" to cool down enough so he wouldn't roast in the attic.

 Speaking of cooler weather, if you ever want to know what the lowest wind chill factor is throughout the entire United States of America, just post this in your Story:

 

 I was inundated with indignant weather reports, and it was hilarious. (The winner was -59 degrees. This is why I live in Florida, gang.)

 

 Getting back to the Big Re-Plumb:

 This is basically camping, right?

Because we had the walls open we had to quarantine the girls in my office. They had toys, warm blankets, a view of the squirrels - every possible kitty comfort. So of course: