Saturday, July 31, 2010
So, John and I have decided we should try to eat a little better.
Not that this is anything new. We make noises like, "we really should try to eat better," and "next week we are *definitely* starting a diet," and "SWEET HEAVEN I AM NEVER EATING AGAIN" at least once a week, on average. This is because we, like many of you, are typical Americans. And by "typical" I mean...er...um...[searching for the politically correct term]...fluffy. In a Garfield-esque kind of way.
After having been burned by extreme diets in the past (Atkins, you sick bastard, you) I knew that I, at least, had to start small. Achievable goals: that's the ticket!
So, step 1: Discuss diet strategies over a frosty.
(This eases one into the dieting process.)
Step 2: Research said diet strategies online.
Step 3: Get sidetracked for about two hours online researching candy-colored synthetic dreadlocks, even though you've never had dreads, will never have dreads, and, frankly, couldn't pull them off stylistically even if you tried. (But srsly, how cute is this girl?!?)
Step 4: Um. Where were we?
Well, if you're looking for any gems of weight-loss advice from a cake-addicted blogger who hasn't seen the sun in approximately 5 days, then I am delighted to tell you that you're nuts.
I can, however, share what's working for John.
2. Scream in horror after discovering every single one of your favorite meals on the "Not That" pages. (You know the Goofy yell? That's what he sounded like, every 5 seconds. It was hysterical.)
3. Buy the Tap & Track iPhone app, which tells you the nutritional info on everything at restaurants and grocery stores and keeps tallies on how many calories you're consuming.
4. Walk on a treadmill a lot.
I think he's already down 8 pounds - in a week. Naturally, I hate him. But in a loving, supportive manner.
And how am *I* doing? Oh, about like this:
Me: "YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME."
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